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Behind every vibrant senior living community is someone working tirelessly to create connection, laughter, and meaningful moments. We sat down with Alto Grayslake’s seasoned Lifestyle Director, Mike Fehland, whose nearly four decades in the field have shaped countless lives—and whose passion continues to inspire residents and staff alike.
What first drew you to become a Lifestyle Director, and how long have you been in the field?
Looking back, it really feels like God had a hand in it. My grandparents were a big part of my life
growing up—my Grandpa Davis lived with us, and my other grandparents lived just a mile and a half away. Even our neighbors’ grandparents were part of our everyday world, so I was always comfortable around seniors.
After college, I toured with an International Christian Repertory Theater Company across the East Coast, Canada, and the Midwest. During that time, I met several Activity Directors who hired us to perform. When I later applied for three positions in Evanston, I received three offers. That was nearly 39 years ago this July 7—and the rest is history (assuming they don’t send me out to pasture first!).
How has your approach to programming evolved since you first started?
At its core, my approach has always been about bringing joy and engagement to everyone—residents, families, friends, and staff. Over the years, I’ve been influenced by incredible leaders like Bill Keane, Kathy Laurenhue, Kathleen Ustick, Julia Noe, Teepa Snow, and Thomas Kitwood—as well as many peers along the way.
What’s something you’ve learned from residents that has stayed with you?
“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
How do you plan activities that appeal to a wide range of interests and abilities?
Be willing to lower the bar so as many residents as possible can participate—then raise it for those who want more of a challenge. And most importantly, have fun with everyone along the way.
Can you walk us through how you build a monthly activity calendar?
Great entertainers are key—I aim to have at least one live performer each week. From there, I build around themes, both obvious and unexpected. I collaborate with residents through our monthly Activity Committee, keep an open door for suggestions, borrow ideas from other communities, and add fresh twists to familiar programs. Lately, I’ve even enjoyed using ChatGPT as a creative resource!
What has been one of your most successful or well-loved events?
Centenarian Celebrations. Reaching 100 years old is a milestone worth honoring, and these celebrations are incredibly special. This year alone, we’ve celebrated three residents in just three months.
How do you incorporate resident feedback into your programming?
I ask. I listen. And I act on it. While the Activity Committee is helpful, everyday conversations are just as valuable. And when a resident’s idea is used, I make sure they’re recognized.
How do you connect with residents who may be hesitant to participate?
I knock on doors—almost every day. Even if someone doesn’t attend, that brief moment of connection matters. I also invite residents to simply observe or lend a hand. Once I understand what motivates someone—whether it’s music, trivia, chocolate, or popcorn—I use that to encourage participation.
How do you collaborate with other departments?
We create monthly event sheets for Dining Services to align food-related programs. I also invite staff to join in—whether it’s stopping by Happy Hour or jumping into an activity. Sometimes the best moments happen when someone just happens to walk by and gets involved.
What has been the most challenging part of your role?
Not being able to get everything done—especially sharing all the great moments on Facebook. I’ve learned that sometimes a few photos or a quick video made at home is enough to capture the spirit of what we do.
How do you keep activities fresh after so many years?
By continuing to learn and explore new ideas. Even something as simple as Bingo can feel new if you bring energy and creativity to it. If I’m not engaged, residents won’t be either—so I make sure every program is enriching and enjoyable.
If you had unlimited resources, what would your dream program look like?
I’d love to create more “above and beyond” experiences for individual residents—like a hot air balloon ride, a fishing trip on Lake Michigan, or meeting someone they’ve always admired. These moments don’t just impact one person—they uplift the entire community.
What do you hope residents feel when they attend your programs?
Joy. I want them to feel uplifted and better than when they arrived.
Looking back on your time at Alto, what are you most proud of?
We’ve had some incredible themed events—Allegro at Sea experiences featuring Greece, Japan, and Spain, as well as a fun Summer Olympics week. But what means the most is seeing a resident go from “I don’t really care for activities” to “What are we doing this afternoon?”
What advice would you give to someone entering this field?
Find support from others in the field. Do programs you enjoy—and learn to enjoy the ones you didn’t expect to love. Keep things fresh, stay creative, and take care of yourself so you don’t burn out.
This conversation is a powerful reminder that great programming isn’t just about filling a calendar—it’s about building relationships, creating joy, and making every day meaningful.
To learn more about Alto Grayslake, click here.
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